“what if things don’t work out with Nikhil?”“I don’t care,” I said – and I was being honest. I really didn’t. I wasn’t worried about the future, about whether we were messing up a friendship. All I knew was that after a really long time, I felt wanted. And he was a friend, someone I had been fond of for a long time, not a random dude trying to score an easy lay – I just felt happy.“okay, take that room,” naina said after a while, propelling me down a corridor. “thank god mom and dad aren’t here this week. Else you would have caused a major scandal!”I waited in naina’s pretty-pink guest room. Nervous, excited. There was a knock on the door a couple of minutes later, and Nikhil walked in.“I can’t believe you told !” he said, half-frowning, half-laughing. “I don’t know whether to be shocked or embarrassed!”“be whatever you like,” I told him. “but come here…”He came on the bed and hugged me tightly and kissed my lips with that I just melted lost all my sense and was just enjoying. I looked down the road, suddenly self conscious. There was no one around but the ballplayers down the road. I stepped into the road and reenacted my steps as best I could, One big step forward, nearly a leap, coming down on my left foot. That was when my knee popped, my foot twisting in the gravel. Another leap, on to my right foot, and the tree was only inches in front of me. I leaned forward and aligned my shoulder against the trunk. I could see how the two broken branches aligned with the scars on my throat and temple. I hugged the tree like a hurtful lover and began to cry. For months I had fought back waves of self pity. I had struggled for strength, and I had shown strength to others, but in my heart I was not strong, not whole, not yet. I had left part of me here, beneath this tree, lying broken in the dirt. Turned from the tree and slowly spinning, I re-enacted my fall. I lowered myself to the ground and sat where I had landed. I looked up into the canopy. The light was.
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